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Tuesday, September 28, 2010

REALITY IN A VIRTUAL WORLD

Today if one has to question what the most precious commodity is then it’s very to assume that “time is certainly the most precious commodity that one has. With Time you can make money but with money one cannot buy back time. Also as of late in the social circles for the past five years I have been listening to people complain about needing therapy. Some think that an eventual cure may lie in a chemical solution (Prozac lithium etc…) or if one gets therapy… also over the past five years I have noticed that clinics are opening up to provide a form of cure to a very common social issue known as addiction… the bottom line is that being online is the worst form and most damaging form of addiction that has plagued us…

More marriages are being dissolved over texting and many innocent lives being destroyed by what we know as social networking media… People are happy sitting in their cubicles late at nights as technology which was made to establish that stuff could be done faster has opened many avenues of distraction thus increasing the amount of time one spends sitting behind a desk. In my humble philosophy of life we have allowed technology to twist our way of thinking and enslaving us thus making us desk potatoes and destroying most forms of procrastination that I was aware of as a child like hanging out with my buddies to play cricket redundant as the computer has taken over…

The online addiction syndrome needs to be addressed with brute aggression and company’s need to establish a fine line between entertainment and healthy activities. The slowdown of people leaving a real world and establishing a domain in the virtual world leads us back to think at how much cardiac and other diseases are on the rise. People have now started developing carpal syndrome – coagulated arteries and many other issues related to being a desk potato.

There was a time when it was great to discover stuff about someone and know them in real life… there was a joy in courting the opposite sex and discovering the negatives and positives and actually understanding the reality of making a significant decision when it came to choosing a partner. Today people can easily google a name get the complete history and see how ones virginity was restored in a clinic after that being spent years in a Cuban prison for terrorism. Today almost all the airborne attacks on the northern regions of Pakistan are done by drones that are flown from somewhere in Utah in the united states where a pilot puts in more time on a simulator than having a firms grip of reality. Also what tools one uses to look cool are brutally aggressive in destroying the old school principles of business where people look at each other as a number and no longer as a human being…

As a global world we need to define activities that are centered around being away from the technology world and around more active and physically engaging sports that do not limit the activity to the clicking of a mouse sitting in a shady room. We need to start focusing on defining lines or boundaries when the work ends and the fun begins… Should we as a world start becoming more active then we could start throwing away blood thinners and anti cholesterol medications that we so eagerly ingest…

If we take time to invest in our selves then maybe we could increase our lives by another 10 – 12 years think about it as you read this post and ask your self how active you really are…

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Friday, September 24, 2010

VOIP FOR DUMMIES

Today the word V-O-I-P = “VOIP”, is a common Telco terminology that is used by those who often have no comprehension of the possibilities that the world of technology can deliver. Ever since half the world switched to fiber from copper and we threw away analog exchanges to have digital interfaces the possibilities of what we could achieve with technology became something we could as humans not evolve with. VOIP is an essential part to any business and people think and try to establish that VOIP only benefits those who are able to deliver offshoring solutions.

The telco world has evolved beyond the vision that it portrayed almost a decade ago. Today an organization can easily establish a powerful communications hub using a virtual environment and deliver results that are unimaginable at such savings that defy the norms of what billing one sees on a daily basis. The reason is that technology has made it possible for you to carry your global identity with you no matter where you are in the world. You could be at a conference in Japan or even sitting drinking margaritas in Mexico and have that one global identity. In short VOIP has the ability to resolve your data / voice / communications needs on an immediate basis that would not hurt you or your wallet at all. Today the world of VOIP is in a triple play format where you could do anything you possibly want in the form of communications and remote monitoring not only for business but for family and recreational needs too.

There are brilliant companies that can help you get up and running and have the ability to port one global identity to an unlimited number of local numbers within multiple countries. Yes you do have that one number. If you would like to get an unlimited number of DID’s or as we say in common language there are a lot of companies that would be very happy to ensure that you get them at a bulk. One of the best ones I could recommend is DID-X. This is one company that will not only help you build a communications gateway in the form of providing numbers from multiple host countries at a bulk rate they will also ensure that you are advised properly and set up in such a manner that your return on investment is guaranteed.

There are many resources on the internet to find out how to set up an exchange and how to ensure that your entire family or office can communicate through one single mode where you don’t go crazy having multiple bills from multiple providers in multiple countries. There are also many vendors who will ensure that no matter who your carrier is you are able to achieved focused and direct results from whatever it is that you so wish to establish in the form of personal to business needs.

Today mastering the communication and the information industry is purely an essential tool to being successful tomorrow. The funny thing is that by the time tomorrow comes today will be old and forgotten. If you are looking for a consultant that can keep up with your needs and the demands to evolve with time I would recommend that you don’t keep all your eggs in one basket and start having multiple vendors so that you don’t have any loss or as we know as down time… The world is quick to change and the environment is very unpredictable and viciously versatile when it comes to doing business which relies upon information. The best thing is that if you are able to master the world of VOIP and communications it could be something which defines how your balance sheet looks at the end of the year irrespective of the fact that you are Major Corporation or a small time one window outlet for printing services…

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Thursday, September 23, 2010

THE CONTACTS THAT MATTER!

Whether we like it or not Pakistan runs on “contacts”! if you want something done either a three rupee phone call will resolve your issue via a contact or your cap ex will significantly go up with the variables involved. For the past three days I did not write a thing because I was sitting and observing the bashing the HEC (Higher Education Commission) received in the form of threats, demonstrations and the resignations of some overtly aggressive educationists who got very worried when it was announced that budgets were being slashed.

I am extremely appreciative of Mr. Laghari, Dr. Mukhtar, Dr. Naqvi and their team for having withstood all the bashings and till this morning sticking to their pens (educationists don’t use guns) and fighting for our investment in the form of human resource abroad. I figured it out that even a fruitwala on the street corner knows someone who can mess up your day. So in short my philosophy is that if we all know each other who know each other then we invented facebook long before some geek put a structure to it. Just think about it.

Ok the solution is simple – we all have to use the AMWAY effect to make this work. If you find five brutally honest partners in crime of some place in society and trust them then tell them to talk to their five friends who matter for the HEC. The good thing is that PTCL will make millions in the form of phone calls going back and forth and this ripple effect will probably get some attention. Today people only do something for those who can do something for them. The HEC has scores of students out there who are under a contract to come and serve Pakistan. So rather than making a noise in an empty room sit down and talk to those who matter and if society wants a change and they want transparency this is the way to do it. CONTACTS!

The HEC needs your contacts and you only use them for personal gain so why not get your contacts to cash in favors owed to you in the form of a phone call that will eventually lead to good government that will be educated. This country was formed on an ideology but it takes people to make that movement happen. Today you may not have much to look forward to and many people to trust. So why not make your own ideology and trust yourself and talk to five contacts that could talk to their five contacts and make a ripple down effect for society. Isn’t it amazing that Pakistan was a physical facebook before we even put a name on it… Contacts do matter and people trust people who are somehow linked to each other – Oh wait maybe even they got the idea of linked in from us… what copy cats!

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Sunday, September 19, 2010

ILLITERACY IN EDUCATION

We are always in the process of judging someone or under the influence that someone is judging us. No matter what society you come from or what truck driver raised you the reality is that you are a victim of being bashed by a society that has refused to evolve with time… Sadly the same goes for education. Today education is the dirtiest Neanderthal age old word that one could use as I find that no matter what society, school, university or hall of education one goes through they are worse of than before they went in.

Our society on another hands in the past 6 years has learnt to commonly use words like Ritalin, efexor, Prozac, lithium, and the favored abbreviated terms of endearment amongst parents of any class are shrink, spock doc, and psych. The parents of today are caught up in a race against time to see how much excitement they can fill into their lives and children have become a secondary priority often left in the care of someone who they feel they can trust because of the slit eyes and ability to say yes master. Often when a child is of the age of ten he or she faces immense amount of pressure from a jury consisting of a very vicious society.

Back to education, when I was a child we did not know what a computer looked like so we slaved for months with the odd tuition to ensure that we got a grade so that we could make it to a good school. There was a healthy competition and we enjoyed trying to be the best achievers. Those were different times and education was an institution. Ever since the nineties it has become a factory where you do your time and once done you are awarded the pension in the form of a piece of paper which says you survived through the confusing battles that you have had to fight. Battles yes, because even though the brand names sell entry to a promised land where society fame and fortune is the goal one does not realize the journey that a child will have to make will brutally destroy every element of his or her sanity.

I personally feel that the stages of evolution that are defined by the big O and then the huge A are a ridiculous form of torture to a modern day child. Today children are perceptive and can adapt to change much faster as when they are born the first thing they see is technology when mommy or daddy take a picture with their million megapixel blackberry and post it on face book. Isn’t it weird that as a parent it took you a life time to adapt to the computer and here as soon as the umbilical cord is cut you document the whole tragedy of the destruction of innocence by being the one who lit the match… I bet my words make you think huh! As kids are educated by a hybrid method of sound experience and video it is ridiculous that we define their place in society by these two redundant exams which I myself am proud to state that I failed. Yes I was the victim of a society where I was judged by the nerdy book smart attitude of my aunts as they would gloat as to how many stars their prodigy had attained and the end result was the mental and emotional destruction of a child – ME! Funny thing is I managed to make it through and today as I do have a choice I realized how brutal society has become and maybe a brand name school is not the right choice for my child as it might be educated but illiterate beyond belief to the awareness in the reality of the here and the now.

As the world has changed parents will always make the same ones that their parents did and blindly overlook the true potential of their children and their own agendas will often lead to a very dysfunctional adult. To create a society one needs to be a part of it by being themselves one needs to understand the business of education. Today establishments are not looking for children who burn out after attaining a million degrees. Companies today are on the hunt for well-rounded people and they are getting fewer with each exam that takes place. Today the biggest exam is getting through life and whilst there are a few essential things that one needs to teach a child a parent needs to understand that every individual has its own way of inwardly digesting information at their own pace.

Pakistan needs to revise its social standards of education and revise the way they bring up their child because the world is disgustingly cruel and even though the world will forgive a child with the punishment of humiliation… our Pakistani society will never let that child live in peace or forget that its ok and allow the wounds of failure to heal… Now remember the words like Ritalin, efexor, Prozac, lithium, how many do you want your children to remember?

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Saturday, September 18, 2010

TO SELL OR NOT TO SELL!

I have been told several times that I am always selling something! Be it a car, movie theater, event, lifestyle or a foreign tour abroad you name it… I sell it! Someone even went so far as to tell me that I should wear an overcoat with pockets in it that carry my umpteen products just like a hustler on the street… When someone meets me they usually get confused because I talk too fast… throw a lot at them to inwardly digest and ramble from topic to topic never sticking to one main core issue… This they tell me is my downfall in “selling” whatever it is I am. I even went so far as to buy a domain name salesforcepk.com and when I announced it to a few people I got mixed reactions as they thought it to be a condiment item in the various protein shake of things that I delved into over the past years…

Yesterday, I was in the process of trying to get some cars registered for my company Islamabad Limos and whilst sitting bargaining the various elements of life and what to write in my next article I realized I was not getting anywhere… After a few cups of chai and soggy biscuits I left with a bigger headache and realized that I was stuck in the limbo of mental flatulence… Yes my virginity of never having a brain fart as a self-proclaimed writer had been robbed! I was the witness to a new feeling of what is known as writers block… I knew deep down inside the gas was there but it was stuck somewhere in the neurons of my mind leaving me with the uncomfortable urge to exhale it but I did not know how. I write on social issues and yes I sell the positivity in life because all the bad news on the television leaves us with the feeling of being incompetent and at the end of the day with a viciously ridiculous attitude that is harmful to ourselves.

So I decided to write about some great salesmen starting with me who is not so famous and a few others and how they made it in life… often I give sales strategies to those who understand their brands best know how to do it with big budgets and are constantly having to justify forecasts that are not currently tangible in ones existing asset inventory. Ok let’s get serious and before we go any further let’s take a look at ourselves. Now understand this one thing which is simple! “WE ARE ALL SALES PEOPLE!” Whether we like it or not we are Pakistani’s and the minute we cross the threshold of sanctuary in the womb and open our eyes our sales training begins! As infants and adolescents our parents sell us to our relatives so that we are accepted socially (who knows color, sex, and our entire anatomy most of all complexion is usually justified). As our umbilical cord of dependence on our parents is cut and we begin the destruction of our innocence with schooling we have to sell ourselves to find a place in institutions of higher learning and the plagued confused societies of today. As we grow hair in our nether regions and reach adulthood we have to sell ourselves to find the most suitable partner in crime to support our journey towards the inevitable. So in short we are always selling ourselves whether we like it or not. The best graphic form to describe this is to sit down with a box of popcorn and watch Disney’s Lion King… This is the circle of life!

As we are all good sales people I would like to inform you what traits you need to develop to become a vicious sales person and what skills you need to sharpen. The first and most important one is the ability to listen and most of all hear. Most salesmen fail because the know what to say and seldom never understand when it is time to shut up. A deadly salesman knows what NOT to say! As a sales man if you focus on meeting the needs of a client and give them a solution that will actually benefit them then automatically their wants will become secondary. Try this, if you have a child that is hungry and wants pizza hut then try making a good looking chicken sandwich and serve it with what you feel would be healthy. Don’t force it on your offspring rather ask them to try it… now as the fact is established that they are hungry – your goal is to give them healthy food… but put your goal aside. Make the food fun for them and ask not demand that they try it. I guarantee that after they try the first bite and the food has crossed the gullet you will not need to argue with how great your lentils and beans taste…

The second is a trait which we all have adopted and that is to have a delusional grip on the reality of the here and now… Try this, if you have any member of your family that is an introvert and all your highly qualified therapist relatives have been trying to get into that beings brain then why not use a different approach… Understand that person and focus on what makes them an introvert… If that person is averse to group settings find some natural quality time with the person in an environment where they feel comfortable and then don’t discuss the issue at hand (smoking, drinking, sex, their friends you don’t like etc.) Just use the jester approach and become an idiot… It usually helps if you talk about your past failures and what almost broke you in life from a funny perspective… Use the weapon of laughter to destroy the walls of insecurity and don’t stop talking about what an idiot you are… usually after a session or two the trust will develop and you could gain an insight into who your kid sister is dating and why? Also if you understand the reality then the subject will subliminally tell you what the need as a solution to their problem…

The third and final point as a salesman that I will discuss is very essential. Every salesman MUST follow this point as it would be crucial to defining their success in this forest filled with fires. Be it your employer your spouse and whoever you should never commit to something you cannot achieve. Develop this respect for yourself and then your surrounding fraternity of thieves (relatives and peers). Realize what you can do and state that… There is no harm in trying to do something but it is devastating to be a David in a world of Goliaths today… Now if you don’t commit to something then don’t demand a salary… All the great salesmen including me live by the commission example of life… (pimp, tout, lawyer, gambler) are other names used to define us so let’s not live up that name. If you are honest with your job then you will not ask for a salary. What defines a great salesman is that he could be in the midst of twenty objections and his paycheck would define his success but his ability to convert the objection into an obstacle and over come it with honest facts rather than empty promises…

Also a brilliant salesman never becomes a recovery agent for the company as his clients are well sought out and carefully chosen… This kills the volume aspect of things and enables a salesman to leave caffeine and nicotine addictions and allows him the time to enjoy his family time… There is a lot that I talk on in the world of sales and how if one looks at sales properly then one can define that this lifestyle is fun and enjoyable… As I end my lecture I would like to ask you to focus on one thing it is known as honesty… The best sales happen when the element of honesty is there and people are not trying to sell... Bottom line – you’re a schmuck! Admit it! And start living! There’s lots to sell you just have to enjoy doing it and know how! Now that this is over – close your eyes and repeat in your own head three words! “I AM INVINCIBLE!”

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Thursday, September 9, 2010

TECHNOLOGY INVESTMENT ADVICE THAT MAKES CENTS!

Today technology is no longer a simple question of IT… It is a race against time to be better stronger and faster. No longer do we need to carry a zippo to light a fuse, a simple 4 digit code is enough to establish that an entire city will have acid rain for the next decade…

Technology has become so diverse today that one really needs to understand what they want to achieve or have a clear understanding of where the wish for it to take them before any of the intricate verticals are invested into. It is today extremely essential that companies do not lose focus of their objective and begin fire fighting with silly issues that are only surface value tension in an ocean of complexities of everyday life.

Many investors have been burnt and many people have a sore backside or thumbs from spending endless hours trying to clone and plagiarize successful business models. Everyone is under the premonition that they will beat an existing market leader with some start up or ask the consumers to shift their loyalties elsewhere into something that will not be able to deliver what the brand name stands for.

I hail from Pakistan and I am proud to be a resident of one of the only four cities of the world where there are FTTH possibilities. Even through our disgruntled image we are very technologically sound as human beings because we are use to crisis management in our daily lives. I feel I have the right to write an article like this because I have remained as one of the leading people who built an entire outsourcing American conglomerate only to watch its owners destroy everything due to vanity and greed.

The industry of the world is struggling to establish what will never happen and that is the denial of the acceptance of what their limitations are. Where there is a will there is a way and people have a need to find solutions so the world fills the gap when someone opens a portal with a void in it. If you are looking to invest in providing a solution to someone then you are on the right track…

Investing in being a solution provider is the best form of respect that one can give to an industry also one needs to understand that people with their limitations on time are looking for simple easy to digest solutions. Some of the best ideas that the eastern world can invest in especially the Russians is the adaptation of medicinal technology for the west. Russian and Chinese doctors are extremely experienced and their radiologists have more experience in diagnosing how to fix a broken bone or how to repair your knees without invasive procedures.

Pakistan also has a huge resource or pool of techies that are extremely dedicated to leaving their names on the score boards of virtual cafes. We have those who have invested in Pakistan sitting in Texas and educate and run the entire office for pennies on the dollar… It makes a lot of cents because when you compare economies of scale cents make sense to Pakistani’s as our life styles are not of the rich and famous…

The Chinese have clearly established that be it a watermelon, mango, apple or any dull product that cost a million dollars they will revamp it make it sexier and even home deliver it to you for such a low cost that either you will question their integrity or your own ability to trust them… They have rocked the world with the re-invention of making life super easy.

Every success story does not need luck or money… in my black and white screen world it needs the bility to find inner nirvana and focus on what you want to do in life. If you are focused and you plan carefully eliminating the greed factor and delivering quality then you will win and as the hindus say the goddess of prosperity “Luxmi” will shine upon you… to be in the world of technology the three main principles you must adopt are as follows
1. The ability to not lie to yourself about your limitation
2. The ability to deliver what your promise
3. The ability to know and understand humility and bury your egos
The ocean of technology is looking for sailors from every port and the best thing is the ships will set sail once you tell them when to… just make sure that you don’t capsize due to your own errors and if you really need proper investment advice you are more than welcome to ask me for it.

Be a part of the solution and not a part of the problem! It’s the geeky thing to do!

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Wednesday, September 8, 2010

SILICONE COATED HAMMERS AND SICKLES!

When I was in school I lived through many theories like the west rocked and basically that the east sucked! As I evolved from my Neanderthal school boy stage into a not so intelligent college idiot the premonition continued and I was heavily influenced by the fact that Lenin Stalin and Mao were communistic control freak fools. I was brainwashed into thinking that anything east of my country was slow incompetent and could not produce any form of quality unless it was Japanese. As my own backward country was thrown into the media revolution I could not help but become witness to a whole world other than what I had witnessed through hearsay be destroyed by visual proof as shown on a television screen. I always believed that seeing is believing and I noticed even though the CIA rocked that the KGB was cool too… In other words television definitely opened up my eyes to the what the world was all about. I was addicted to channels like Russia today and various Chinese channels that depicted how life existed in reality and was not confined to being a taboo behind the gates of the forbidden city… Moreover, I was relieved that China Romania and the Soviet Union were actually quite hip with amazing night life, culture and had an extremely progressive outlook on life…

When Pakistan was blessed with the internet and I had my rocking 9600 bps connection it was like someone had stamped my passport with tons of visas and given me access to unlimited countries and domains… so being a typical hot blooded male from a moderately conservative nation I did my part to pollute my brain by paying homage to the famous playboy site… After the “you’ve seen one you’ve seen them all” philosophy hit me like a freight train I got bored and decided to dabble in the world of this new found booming industry… Yes I am guilty of trying to re-invent the wheel and also every over smart and not so intelligent friend was by my side to help me lose whatever savings that I had in my foolish endeavors.

When VOIP happened to me and I could see the person I was talking to for almost free a whole new world of problems and solutions was thrown in front of me. Yet I was blind as to the power of the East! The Chinese / Russians and anyone with half a brain had developed something so powerful that not even another holocaust could destroy if it tried. Forget communism this was a weapon and is a weapon that is so powerful that it can offset any economy and if it chooses build a nation and destroy anyone or anything in its way. I as a child was used to gollywogs and Cossacks and clichéd depictions of cultures but by far my realization of the following facts blew the doors of any not so intelligent secret service…

All that was draped in a red flag with a few yellow stars or a hammer and a sickle had trained and educated their billions of citizens how to speak not only their local language but how to speak with different western dialects. Bottom line Anthropology 101 was hammered into their citizens along with technological abilities with the focus on hard core quality being the primary concern. This army of techies today is the most powerful and undefeatable army that the west should fear. Russians stopped focusing on oil and the Chinese took an apple and now mass produce it for their western consumer base that is ready to lap up every ounce of profit it can.

The west focused on living on credit and the east held onto its culture, humility and expanded its knowledge base, Today we don’t need Yuri or who flung dung to be a 45 year old sleeper agent sitting in Washington waiting to wipe out the president of any country for a decade… it’s probably going to be a little girl known by her screen name which will most probably be “candy puff girls rule” or “hello kitty good by doggie” who can cripple the entire economy of the west with the single click of a key…

Education is a powerful weapon – it trains you how to control emotions and make educated decisions. Today I am extremely happy to state that half of the west’s technology is developed in the east and this has been through the realization of the power of education. Bottom line the new logo for silicon valley should be an anvil and we need to stop treating the east like black smiths even though we have forged an image in our minds that they are backwards… they have knowledge, understanding and the ability to spend the hard earned monies of the western taxpayer. The only thing I love about the whole thing is that the underdog actually won!

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Tuesday, August 24, 2010

HOW DID YOU FIND ME?

There is a saying… “God invented man… Man invented technology… Technology killed God… “ I remember the time when I used to run around and play cricket or if given permission my excitement was to cycle to the market and get stuff. I remember the time when in Ramadan my friends and I used to meet up and our entertainment was two broken chairs and a cricket bat and a ball… I remember the time when the game hide and go seek meant something… Aaah those were the innocent days of freedom…

Today I am a trapped rat surrounded by chains of technology – the perfect example could be a victim of the horror movie hell raiser… I am bound by those chains which feed my vanity and even though I try I could probably sever ties with a family member but if anyone stole my mobile I would have a major coronary.

Now as I look back I remember it all started with the concept of Paktel and Instaphone. The minute democracy started its revenge upon Pakistan these bricks that defined our position in society became essential. The media helped too infernal shaheen tv network started the ball rolling and boom Indus networks started with the popular so called freedom of satellite television… As the illusion of freedom became the war cry we did not pay attention to the small caption which declared that technology was a passport to the enslavement of all Pakistanis…

Today if you want to find your husband cheating on you, get the dirt on an ex-boss who you feel has not re-payed you what he borrowed or dif into the coffins and find out how big a virgin your wife was then look no further… People today have an obnoxious disregard for integrity of the internet or cellular highways… social networking sites such as face book google applications and the very mobile connections you use can help pinpoint in which bathroom you are sitting on what street in what country… doing… let’s leave that up to your imagination. If you are insecure about getting kidnapped then stop posting your daily schedule on black berry messenger – if you don’t want the credit card people finding you then for crying out loud stop posting your latest pictures in Bangkok with the entire office at a go go bar.

The funny thing is that people want to blame technology but that is highly ridiculous. If you use technology smartly then you will not wind up a cyber freak junkie who’s only fix is to see online how many cows were milked on a virtual farm… By posting ridiculous information be it serious or humorous… you paint a profile as to your likes – dislikes – sexual preferences and religious beliefs… Unwanted friends often add to your closet attractions by unwittingly adding pictures of you a few years ago (when you were wild) with someone with something not so legal in a not so legal position doing something completely illegal thereby getting you sacked from your legal job and having an immense amount of explaining to do to your legal counsel whilst trying to make the best of a terrible situation with your legally wedded significant other…

So in short be careful of what you put out there and if you can – disconnect your personal life from your professional life and definitely from the world… People love misery more than achievement so leave those stories to be told by Holly Wood and bollywood…

Let's be professional friends - (please see my reccomendations) - https://www.linkedin.com/in/amynaghulamali/

If you would like a direct FREE consultation please contact me on - amyn@ghulamalis.com

Saturday, August 21, 2010

THE HONESTY IN LYING

I am sure when you were going through a job interview you were asked “what were your responsibilities and what was your salary?” I’m also sure that instinctively you inflated the figure and ardently elaborated how you were the glue that held it together for whom so ever you worked for!

Now if it also suited the employer then guess what all is good! If it did not and you were a struggling underdog hoping to get a home loan approval you would never get any respect rather humiliation for your honesty! Isn’t it weird that when you have a full hand how people try to loan you money? IF your cards are down and the concept is fantastic then you get nothing more than a handshake as you are walked out of the door by security.

Look at our society today, when you leave the house you put on your best smile and whistle on the way to work as you are expecting to have a good day. On the way back you’re ready to run over anyone that comes in your way. And the world stinks most of all you lost the faith that you woke up with about humanity. To further add to my justification on the frustration felt by those who are trying to lead honest lives take a look at our political system. Before and after a politician stands for office we do everything if not even physically try to destroy them as we feel that they are the worst vampires around. However in government we support them and the brotherhood syndrome comes about.

Also we love to sit down and claim that we know the world and are notorious for being related to the entire population of this country as long as they are of some plastic significance to society. The minute we have no need for them in our lives we don’t keep quite rather assassinate them (but only behind closed doors)

Lastly if you drive a car have you noticed that all the beggar boys and girls with wipers and plastic bottles or crutches have almost vanished from the street light signals which they bought! The reason is that their mafia found greener pastures in looting and pillaging in the villages where you are sending aide. Just think the common hari or farmer is innocent of city crime yet aid trucks are being looted and people beaten up. Those who are the real victims have not yet come out of shock and are still trying to draw invisible lines in the water where their home once stood. In reality this brutal beggars mafia has moved to loot those who have nothing.

Today I think we should leave honesty and integrity in our suitcases as people only want to hear what they want to hear. The common man alone, forget the politician finds any form of truth unbearable. Now that a disaster had hit us we need to re-establish those bonds of trust within our country that we ignored. In the rebuilding process(healing) we need to start from the grass roots and acknowledge that as we are re-building a nation then the ideology behind the bricks and mortar has to be based on establishing the old school principle of honesty and integrity.
Right now all the masses are looking for sanctuary as this disaster has left their faith in everything very tarnished. People need to be educated how to trust each other and look forward to a better form of living… I end this article with a question… How are you doing your bit to make a change as you tell your friends over a latte and a cigar?

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WRONG MAN FOR THE RIGHT JOB!

I have been told that I am a very good salesman and I love the thrill of the kill which would have made me perfect for this task… I tend to disagree… I support companies or organizations that are good to their word believe in good values and want to do something purely because they are passionate about it… The ethos which formed the organization is honest. Qatar Airways / Telenor and Pepsi Cola are a few of the organizations that I can openly and honestly support because they know what good business is all about…

When you owe someone a favor then you better be prepared for anything as you don’t know what they could ask you for… Even Mario Puzo wrote down words that went down in history… “It’s Only business! But one day I will ask a favor of you and that day our score will be settled! (THE GOD FATHER) That is what happened to me… Finally I can breathe a sigh of relief as an organization to which I was indebted for its support came calling at my door. The favor was fundraising for this organization which mind you is an international registered charity that has proven its self when Pakistan was struck by the earthquake…

I am not the most diplomatic brown nosing mega freak who will give in to the norms of society. I am brutally arrogant and have a big yuck fou on my forehead to anyone who I feel is a bully. I am opinionated and very passionately aggressive in all the few million of the things I do. I hate hypocrisy and am quick to retort when there is any form of injustice… So in short I am not the best FUNDS RAISER… never the less I was successful at raising over eighteen thousand dollars but t he following is a series of observations that I have made over the past 72 hours of FUND RAISING… This article was going to be named “The profit in charity!” but then I realized that I was the wrong man for the right job… My reasons are explained below…

1. There is real profit in charity - people have lost their faith in giving to a good cause because there are so many of them out there (this was told to me by a cheeky pothead sales manager for a telco)
2. People have lost their faith in general - By the time the amount gets to those who need it the donor would have given enough to feed an army for a week but the recipients might be lucky to get used toothpicks
3. Also those who are bored start up their own ventures and God only knows if the intentions are true
4. Those who wanted recognition were giving to a cause in order to score points with God only knows whom.
5. People do not know where or who to give money to…. (please find a list of organizations who are good to their word and very credible as they have the resources to provide aid)

a. RED CROSS RED CRESENT
b. WORLD FOOD PROGRAM (UNITED NATIONS)
c. EDHI FOUNDATION
d. ISLAMIC HELP UK
e. PAKISTAN ARMED FORCES
f. AGA KHAN FOUNDATION

I would like to share some advice with you…
• Please do not give money or any funds to anyone who you know will not be able to give you a receipt (donations are tax deductible) and someone who is not a registered charity…
• Don’t give you pierre cardin sweaters away or your Louis vitton bags give the most valuable thing you have today and that is time…
• Be involved and before you become a complete Muslim from the first of Ramadan take time to find humility….
• If you have donated in any way then simply say no to those who shirk your feelings of trust

Jinnah Gandhi Martin Luther King even Dr. Muhammad Younus all had a vision just like us… The only thing is they had faith which helped make a vision into reality… Faith is a strong thing become a true believer – not with your atm card but with each second you can spare…

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If you would like a direct FREE consultation please contact me on - amyn@ghulamalis.com

THRILL OF THE KILL & THE ART OF WAR

One needs to understand a few things first before I delve into my ramblings of the subject above. 

Let’s begin with the current Pakistani situation – Our perfect little world is depressed an upset!  Violent crime is on an increase out of necessity and not fun, teenage pregnancies are causing bumps in our social standing as we have no time to listen to the problems of our daughters, The youth has delved its self into chemical recreation and the average adolescent child has the ability to graduate into his or her teenage years as a fully competent alchemist… Just like ghouls in a cheap horror flick the masses have no home and the primary industry upon which Pakistan relied has been brought down to its knees.  Inflation is on a rise and our basic requirements in life like cigarettes, petrol, condoms, fermented beverages along with wheat barley and rice are on a ridiculous increase…

Ok if that was bad then let’s consider how our Human Nature will react to this.   Today when we see an accident on a busy road we slow down to see if we can only see if anyone is hurt and hopefully a gory blood filled accident or a broken limb will suffice for us to slow down and stop traffic.  If not then the misery of watching a good stickup will substitute and our way of reacting will be with a disapproving “tsk tsk how sad and unfortunate” statement.   Bottom line we are predators in the hunt for any news or a situation that would be so bad that it would throw the focus of our own miseries…

Basically we are in a war – a losing jihad against ourselves… the reason is because no one educated us how to deal with chaos and society never allowed us the luxury of finding the time to plan or sit in a class room that taught us how to accept responsibility for our actions.  Today as we battle our own demons we have successfully managed to destroy what we once prided in which were family values with hidden agendas and open honesty we traded in for a quick fix commission…

Ok now that we are in a war let’s look at what makes a great Warrior – Starting with Ghengis Khan I would like to quote what he used to tell his opponents “ I am the wrath of God!  You must have done something terrible for him to have sent a punishment like me upon you!” Alright, now take a peek at Aristotle “We make war that we may live in peace!” and if we look at the Chinese then Mao was right when he said “Civilize the mind but make savage the body”.  That is exactly what the Chinese did – found humility and make factory upon factory to mass produce anything that the west invented at a billionth the cost…

In order to become a brilliant warrior one has to understand also the tranquility found within the insanity of a suicide bomber before the destruction occurs.  One needs to understand how the samurai and the mughals fought with respect honor and dignity.  If you really want to become a great warrior then the greatest achievement you will have will be the glory of those you don’t know coming to pay homage to you at your funeral.  Messed up huh!  Warriors like Benazir got they glory once six feet under…  Ok so now you don’t want the glory – listen if you want to go to heaven then you HAVE to die!  I have not met one suicide bomber or warrior of any kind who sent me a text message from above stating that life rocks and its much more than 72 that we promised…  also my lexus never runs out of gas and I can fly as I now have wings…  Bottom line my Pakistani citizen is that you need to have faith in order to be a great warrior.  To end this tangent I would like to quote sean connery who said in the rock “ losers are everywhere – winners go home and bang the prom queen”.

You have to understand that in order to be the best warrior and to survive in the madness that surrounds you in your corporate world that before you put on your knock off ties and assume another personality that surrounds you that

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Thursday, February 11, 2010

JOBS?- WHAT TO DO!

Shit man we all go through this -

1.       Sit down and understand the job you are applying for and research the qualities they are looking for in a person
2.       Find out who the line of reporting is to
3.       Set a bench mark in your mind of what you can realistically achieve for the employer

Once done and you know you can be honest to the job - Now you have to fit it into one page for a buffoon whose only weapon is his or her frustration at looking through a pile of fabricated bull crap that the world would have emailed to them without spell checking or using a theasaurus…

4.       Make sure it fits into one page
5.       Ensure it is single spaced – with arial as a font and size 11
6.       Try to put in facts and do not go over with your abominable taste for rhetoric
7.       Support them with KPI’s of success
8.       Leave your personal interests out – like swimming (basically float around in a pool as your belly states that) great chess player (people don’t like someone with too many brains as most people recruiting are insecure of their own jobs as they sit and fart around all day – note that is why they are hiring you to do the work)

9.       Try to deliver the resume or document in a paper printed format to the responsible person via a contact…  DO NOT GO YOUR SELF…  ensure the person states and understands that you should get the job on merit…  just so that their ass is never online in case you drain the company or your boss and take off…

DO NOT email as people who don’t even have an official account get spammed with everything from Viagra to visa lottery mails…

10.   Your follow up should always be via an official line and not on a mobile – respect the integrity of the persons time and remain professional

11.   If you are lucky enough to get the interview call
a.       Ask how much time you will have during the interview to state your abilities
b.      Have a haircut the day before
c.       On the day make sure your shoes are polished – even ferregamo looks like crap if its dirty… 
d.      Make sure you are respectably dressed and have showered –
e.      Do the potential employer a favor and don’t empty an expensive knock off perfume all over yourself as it is an interview for a respectable job and not an audition to perform late at night under a street lamp to pick up john’s
f.        Always be there 30 minutes before time and ensure you tell someone who is manning the counter (not a security guard who is already upset that you smell and look better than him and has to open the door for you) – be early because people usually want to go and piss or shit or need a smoke once they are under any kind of stress… 
g.       Ok once you have pooped / peed or had your nicotine fix wash your hands and dry them…  if your throat is dry ensure you ask for water at room temperature and sip it don’t gulp it down because – (yes you will be in the middle of your discussion and your mind will go blank as your adrenalin is pumping and all you will thing about is pissing and not delivering the message…)
h.      NOW YOU WILL THINK IM A COMPLETE IDIOT BUT GUESS WHAT – JERK OFF OR GET YOUR WIFE TO BLOW YOU OR YOUR HUSBAND TO GET DIRTY AND REALLY FUCK THE SHIT OUT OF YOU Two hours before the interview – MAKE SURE YOU CUM – REASON the testosterone level and estrogen levels will dominate and once mixed with the adrenalin pumping through your veins fuck up your reason to logic – after sex one is usually calm and has literally gotten an unwanted load off – he he he – so now no matter what the employer throws at you even though the ac is on and her nipples are rock hard to cut through diamonds – your focus will be the job and not fantasizing about you could be the next sex slave bound in leather on her or his desk.
i.         Lastly do NOT send in your old visiting card as that states insecurity – make out a printed piece of paper with your name / position to be interviewed for and the time and with whom – do not put by reference of at all
j.        Make three copies of this as usually the idiot female at the counter when you hand it to her will be lost in her own world and write down the days order for lunch or her thokus number who has promised to dump his wife and make her the queen of america


12.   OK FINALLY YOU MEET THE PERSON
a.       Read a person when you meet them and look at body and facial language – whilst doing this take six deep breaths inhale from the mouth and exhale from the nose slowly to stabilize your blood pressure and excitement (remember the last time you were so excited was when you were having sex for the first time…) usually the way a person greets a person states a lot about their personality…
b.      Don’t strip them naked with your enthusiastic eyes or be too over confident – people hate a cheeky beggar…
c.       Do keep eye contact and ensure whatever salutation you begin with ends with sir or maam
d.      Whatever you do just don’t state that so and so bhai or uncle or whoever the fuck gave your paper to the person is the reason you are there – you just shot your abilities and will come across as someone who is an insecure mommies boy who has not yet stopped breast feeding…
e.      Bottom line your resume got you in (yes someone helped – but that’s over) its about you now so respect the time window and ensure you display professionalism even if your breasts are 55 double d’s or you feel that your uncle is the president of what ever)…  the first impression is the last so please don’t fuck it up… with your vanity

13.   Make sure you keep to the point and stick to work related stuff
14.   If you have questions ask them – you cant get shot down for asking what you don’t know – it also states your confidence to aske before fucking up the budget and ASS U ME ing something
15.   When it comes to the compensation be diplomatic and don’t prematurely blurt out a number – ask what they feel you are worth and politely ask them to state the respect in the form of a number specific to your abilities and not what the position pays – every position has a figure because when HR people are bored that is what they do – make your life miserable by coming up with plagiarized policies from the web – most importantly I have landed jobs worth millions by being a confident and patient negotiator
16.   Always leave a comfort zone for the employer to understand that you will not be a nightmare employee later and will be an asset and a liability…
17.   When leaving keep the respect and remember to ask two questions
a.       By when will you make your decision
b.      With whom should I follow up and may I have a contact email – (not number)
18.   If God meant it to be then you could land the job – or guess what join the masses and start looking somewhere else…

Let's be professional friends - (please see my reccomendations) - https://www.linkedin.com/in/amynaghulamali/

If you would like a direct FREE consultation please contact me on - amyn@ghulamalis.com