Friday, February 7, 2014

Deja Chu

"Deja Chu"

In Pakistan we all get a feeling of “Deja Chu” (the feeling of having met that “chutia” before) every ever so often.   Who we the public consider to be a chutia today vanishes from the scene because a bigger one struggles to take his or her place temporarily until the forces that be entrust the chutia crown back upon that person head… 

You have to admit that as a nation we love to love anything foreign, be it clothes, actors, cars music but as a dheet log we are passionate about loving to hate anything society will tell us to hate.  Mostly society is not wrong when it tells us to hate that chutia(s) but somehow society its self is a big hypocrite as it loves to repeatedly forgive these cretins and subject its self to Deja Chu again when it hands them the keys to the parliament.

I was living in Islamabad in the G5 / G6 sector and it was about 4 o clock in the afternoon.  I had a night job in a US / Shaheen Foundation company and was getting ready for work when out of my window I saw tanks yes tanks roll by with soldiers in combat gear with grenades.  Moments later I saw men with Ak 47’s in Shalwar Kameez running at the tanks and when I heard gunfire I ran out the back of my house jumped over four boundary walls and sat in a taxi and fled for my office in the G9 sector. I though India had attacked us and as I walked into my office barefooted in my trousers and a banyan I watched the Lal Masjid episode unfold.  I was there first hand and saw how a guerilla fighting force could attack.

I witnessed the coup led by the Army against Nawaz Sharif as I was at the Karachi Airport when I saw APC’s roll onto the grounds and soldiers take over the country.  On television I witnessed the sons of the soil take over control of a supposed democracy that was about to run astray.  There was a fear that if things were allowed to go their due course it would damage the nation.

I saw the love in a nations eyes when they elected a man that was a convict and someone they could not stand at all, I felt their sympathy when the business minded Gordon Gecko negotiated his way through five years (which is a remarkable feat actually) of grueling hardship and managed to devalue the rupee in the international market to a painful amount that even the angels in heaven threw a party when he got the guard of honor.  I guess they were happy that the awaam would not be crying so much!

I watched the TV all night as a Canadian came to town and did exactly what Malcom X & Dr. Martin Luther King did.  He moved enough people to make the world realize that it should not consider the common man to be a chutia.  This one off one hit wonder has been forgotten but Islamabad learnt a lot of lessons that night when every citizen of the twin cities was subjected to being held hostage in their own backyard.

Lastly I witnessed a team that worked hard to win the world cup and then saw a man steal the limelight on emotions to gain endorsements from the likes of Diana Princess of Wales to build a fantastic institution that saves lives.  But then I saw this same man wave a cricket bat whilst intoxicated with the political rush of fame and popularity and become a spokesperson for the Taliban when its vote bank consisted of elite girls in tank tops and twitter accounts.  Today he is scratching his head and licking his wounds and confused as to why the talks with the Taliban will not work and how he got sidelined in another Deja Chu situation.

The bottom line is that as a nation we struggle to be called what we are born from and love to make mamoo’s out of each other!  When will we as a nation understand that we have the power to shift the image that we are for sale?  We hate prostitution as it goes against our religious values yet we hire out or emotions and loyalties to those who make promises to us that they never keep.  Everyone sells out and everything becomes for sale when it comes to politics. Since the majority of us are Muslims I would like to ask you as a nation why on earth does corruption run within your soul?   When will you stand up and realize that Islam is NOT a radical movement…  It is a beautiful religion that is based upon peace and love. 

In my eyes to be a true Muslim you must embrace Islam and the teachings within the Holy Quran out of love.  If you agree with me that violence, suicide bombings, terrorizing a government to get your way are wrong then please stand up as a country and for the love of God take back your civil rights…  or you can be ready to keep getting that Deja Chu feeling every second day!

Monday, February 3, 2014



I do not care what anyone has to say about Pakistan being a lost cause and I am tired of listening to people tell me how bad things are in the country.  I am a Pakistani and more over a proud Karachiite.  I am strong because I am able to put food on the table even though Karachi has over 230 holidays a year (including forced ones) I am a survivor because I have been robbed and mugged in front of cops who told me “hota hai” and turned their heads to scout for a double sawari where they would get a hundred rupees yet I have faith that there is good in this city.  I am lucky because I have always managed to be at the right location and not near a bomb blast which happens at-least once a week.  I am a sinner NOT a Kaafir because that title has been taken by the clerics who manipulate the innocent with their version of Islam.

Actually with the way things are going and as we always seem to bring our pure religion into everything and divide society within a second I have a few questions for those who have openly sinned less than me in their lives as our country’s leaders elected leaders. 

Do you really think that having a naach gaana under a plagiarized logo in a city that has no commercial ties and association with large volumes of people and spending 70+ crores is a wise idea or a good political move?  

I believe that all the resources if spent wisely upon Karachi and specially where the PPP get their vote bank from in Lyari would help the people immensely.  Those people badly need what Zulfiqar Ali Bhutto promised to them which was Roti Kapra Makaan and only on his words those people have been so loyal.  Why are we dancing and singing in the middle of ruins as though we are trying to produce a Hindi blockbuster when the people of Lyari are being treated like the step children of a 47th wife.   There is so much promise in that township which proudly stands and votes for the legacy of ZAB.  If you want a true test of faith then Lyari is it.  All you hear about is the violence and no one bothers talking about the culture of Sindh though the eyes of a Lyariite.  With 70 crores being invested wisely in this town the immature maternal grandson of the great politician would have secured his place in history  but sadly he chose to throw a ball in the desert.

Do you think giving a facelift to the Taliban will resolve all the insecurities of the west and the government?

How does one do plastic surgery upon an entire culture that has a diverse view on how the people of Pakistan should feel about living?  Can you define what is politically right when it comes to getting your way via suicide bombings and sectarian violence?  Also it baffles me as to how a cricketer evolved in to a humanitarian by building an institution that does so much good and then slipped into a quicksand of politics where he compromises all the values of Shaukat Khanum that saves lives as he wants to have tea and crumpets over a discussion with fanatics that have taken more lives in the past ten years as compared to those lost in the 71 war.  How on earth did this morphing of values or maybe ignorance to humanity happen is one of the greatest questions yet to be answered directly by the Pashtun who has been chosen to represent a faction who ignored that he does not sport a beard?

Lastly I ask that do you really think that the likes of Mush will be allowed to talk? Or has any politician been allowed to “talk” freely?

Pakistan is filled with sinners like me and the ones who have played the innings of politics and or donned and doffed a uniform are the ones who will always have to pay a hefty price.  As Pakistan is a land that is known for  not only for its negotiating skills that flow through the veins of the average Pakistani it is also known for its secrets.  We boast the most effective intelligence agency and we are known for the secrets we have and the unsolved mysteries that get brushed under the presidential carpets.

In its entire history Zulfiqar Ali Bhutto was the only unlucky politician that was publicly hanged to please the Red White & Blue and then Pakistan paid the price by giving birth to the Taliban whilst having the CIA as a mid-wife who did a very painful delivery for which we are still paying the price as a nation today.  The forces that be (not just the Army) will never allow the “Chief” to speak as too many bishops knights and queens will fall in this game of chess.  In Pakistan everything happens for a price either it is paid in suit cases of the father of the Nations picture on a brown note or via a favor negotiated at a prestigious club or over glasses clinking late in the evening.   Why must we as a nation suffer the dramatics as displayed by the media when we all know evidently that if a son of the soil has to take an oath of honesty he will tear down the mere foundations of what our constitution stands upon once he is forced to give names. 

We only heard what the late wandering eye of justice harped about.  We also saw the power shift when we fell for the tears of an unfortunate widower, we passionately stood up in arms in tank tops and shorts at teen talwar with a fair and lovely version of the Taliban and waved cricket bats.  Now we are falling for emotions yet once again and as a nation that loves mothers and sisters so much (our two most vulgar slang words really emphasize this) we are ready to become mamoos to honor our endorsement of the same fact.

The Pakistani people have a brilliant future but sadly they will choose to run on emotions and try their best to ignore the core issues of society and drag out petty issues to fight on.  If you really want to resolve the issues of today then as a nation do the right thing and plan for tomorrow …  without emotions!

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