Saturday, May 24, 2014

Controversial Business!

I met Sir Elton John in England in 1989 at the HMV music store on Bond Street! (really sucked that I did not have a camera and that smartphones, hashtags and instagram did not exist) whilst signing an audio tape box I asked him how does one become a recognized musician and he replied (NOT verbatim) “one should always make such a fantastic first impression so that people remembered that person even when he or she had left the room!”
Today controversy or controlled mayhem sells and pays you in hard cash!  That is ridiculously funny in a very positive way for your wallet!  When its election time the TV channels talk about ratings when your advertising company tries to sell you a campaign it tries to estimate the number of eyeballs that would see it!  Also the more the traffic the more expensive the hoarding!
People. Companies, products, brands, anything really is now desperate to be remembered… Why?  With human beings enslaved to technology and having so much information to digest people forget the newest thing within seconds because it becomes old as something more outrageous pops along!  
When celebrities shout and scream about their “cookies & cream” videos being posted online and freak out, it’s actually nonsense!  Come on doesn’t common sense tell you that if two people make a selfie tota then one of them has had to have shared it with full knowledge of what will happen (either that or the person was bound gagged and really a spastic to have allowed this to happen)

Whether it’s googles or a gunshot wound or someone brushing past you in a crowd, anything that will make the public remember you is what matters!  Just look at any Ufone advert…  the regular goof troop has done a brilliant job of making stupidity pay the company in hard cash!

Some of the best deals that tragedy has gifted to many people are...
Mathira – indian movie contracts (she aspires to be Sunny Leone) 

Malala Yousuf Zai – Millions in book deals (sterling) endorsements and a
Nobel Peace Prize 

Lal Masjid Burkha Maulana – Spokesperson for Taliban and millions in endorsements from KPK and Saudi Arabia 

Pervez Musharraf who’s in the line of fire has generated billions in dollars and public speaking alone gave him millions through US book Publishing! 

Imran Khan played the world cup prize giving ceremony with a “I love mom speech” he got a princess to come here to Pakistan, managed to make a political party, married British nobility, produced two sons, became the chancellor of a UK university… 

Asif Ali Zardari – All was forgiven when his wife died… and you know what happened next… 

Sherry Rehman – was brushed aside in a rally march and wound up brushing everyone else aside when the time came to pick a US ambassador. 

One pound fish got so connected that he got a UK nationality out of a country that had deported him along with residual income from PTCL and the national exchequer 

We really saw EYE TO EYE when Mobilink changed its company colors over a chap who had bad hair and anything but beautiful eyes!  That deal alone for brand ambassadorship had so many zeros attached to it that he never needs to look anyone in the eye!  

Amir Liaqat had so much fun abusing cussing and making a fool of us that the corporate world decided to endorse his obnoxious behavior to an extent where he was auctioning off babies online??? 

The chappies who got done for spot fixing now have book deals to tell their side of the story worth millions of sterling! 

The chap who killed the late Governor Taseer has over 8 mosques named after him! 

The cherry on the pie is Mr. Altaf Hussain who somehow manages to shut down an entire city when he frowns on the media in London! 

Pretty soon Hamid Mir will become the most expensive commodity as we now HAVE to feel sorry for him! 

So irrespective of what you tell me! Negativity does pay you in hard core cash as long as you have a fantastic publicist who knows how to devise a surgically perfect strategic plan to make you from the bad guy into a victim… and victims always get charity!

As an emotional nation we really auction off our intelligence to whats app and facebook videos and stupid controversial emails by making these chaps more richer! 
It does not matter what you say about them the bottom line is that you managed to remember these people even when you did not need to or want to!

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Disclaimer! - The opinions I post are my own and I do not intend to hurt or offend you!  If you cannot allow me my freedom of thought then you have the right to voice an opinion and navigate away on the web.  If you follow my blog I thank you as it’s quite ridiculously entertaining...that is if you like what & how I write!

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