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Saturday, August 21, 2010

GETTING TO THE ROOT OF THE MATTER

 A couple of weeks ago I visited a friend and his wife who had been blessed with a child.  To add to the joy in a muslim society the child was a boy so I guess it was time to bring out the bubbly and cigars and rejoice.   As we exchanged greetings I noted an element of stress in his tone. 

After the pleasantries and the cosmetic smiles and hugs with the parents we were served an excellent array of goodies that one can only be found in a house that has just been blessed with a new wife or a child…  My wife and I left we were quiet and as we got out of the driveway an epiphany hit us… The new father was extremely uneducated in how he could afford educating this new blessing of the almighty.  Mind you the man was a top notch sales head for a major technology firm with Benjamin Franklins all around him.

As we engrossed ourselves in a discussion about education we realized the following that no one or anybody wanted to accept any responsibility for the current literacy rate today.  In passing the buck one did not look at the fact that schools like Roots / Grammar / Froebels  did not enroll children rather they were all stuck with a confused generation of little tyrants that were bi-products of their own parents confusion.  Today’s child grows up extremely fast mentally and is an emotional weapon. One with which a parent who themselves grew up with in the 80’s or 90’s cannot keep up with. 

We realized that when we were growing up there was a level of innocence and that we went out to play all over our neighborhoods with the endorsement of our parents.  In our day we were made to read and write and gain knowledge also our parents took the time to establish a bond with us which was based upon a sound and firm foundation of respect,  Our parents were our mentors and unlike today where we have confused children into believing that parents are friends and destroyed all family values our social stigmas were a fraction of what they are today.
People say that schooling is very expensive…  Well why don’t parents take the responsibility today to understand quality and where their responsibilities start and where the teacher’s role comes in.  the media has confused our children so why do we add to it with vague boundaries of what is acceptable and what is not.  Parents do not discipline their kids today at all.  One has to understand and be fair to an educator before they go barging into a school whining and complaining that their child was humiliated by being made to stand in a corner because they were verbally offensive.

Also what is impressive is the fact that how the modern day child has had the ability and power to change the English language… there are more three letter abbreviations and a whole Iliad of new words that one knows are not socially acceptable that this generation has developed to add to Websters or oxford dictionary… 
By being stressed about the cost of educating your own child you do not add to the problem rather you present the image of a parent that does not have any parenting skills.  You need to give up the chocolate latte time and your manicures and maybe manage your schedule further and do the boring job of sitting down and explaining tangents to your child before they go off on one by being brainwashed by someone who really does not care in doing your job for you after school hours. No amount of money cell phones and hand me down family cars justify the establishment of family values and quality time which will be a major factor in stopping children  from finding other avenues to satisfy this void created by parents.

On a closing note it should be noted that in the past decades we have through our children discovered that we cannot replace love with money…  time is extremely important and a bond between a child and parents leads to helping the child decide that they do not want to be teenage parents.  That maybe if they could talk their issues out the youth might not resort to chemical based recreational substitutes to try and hide their misery…  Bottom line as a parent if you talk the talk – then walk the walk and yes you will have to stop blaming a system that you created… and take responsibility…

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